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by **admin_pornrev** » Sat Jul 18, 2009 9:27 pm

Adam and Eve, some dick jokes, and a doctor joke
by Dick » Tue Apr 21, 2009 4:19 pm

One fine morning in Eden, God was looking for Adam and Eve, but couldn't find them. Later in the day God saw Adam and asked where he and Eve were earlier. Adam said, "The morning Eve and I made love for the first time."

God said, "Adam, you have sinned. I knew this would happen. Where is Eve now?"

Adam replied, "She's down at the river, washing herself out."

"Damn," says God, "now all the fish will smell funny."

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A man is lying in bed in the hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his hands and feet.

"Nurse," he mumbles from behind the mask, "Are my testicles black?" Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, I'm only here to wash your hands and feet".

He struggles again to ask, "Nurse, are my testicles black?" Finally, she pulls back the covers, raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and his testicles in her other hand and takes a close look, and says "There is nothing wrong with them!"

Finally, the man pulls off his oxygen mask and replies, "That was very nice but, are... my... test... results... back?

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A man and a woman were driving down the road arguing about his deplorable infidelity. Suddenly the woman reaches over and
slices off the man's pecker.

Angrily, the woman tosses the pecker out the window of the car.

Driving behind the car is a man in a pick-up truck with his 10 year old daughter chatting away beside him.

All of a sudden, the pecker smacks the pick-up in the windshield and flies off.

Surprised, the daughter asks her daddy, "Daddy, what in the heck was that?"

Not wanting to expose his 10 year old daughter to sex at such a tender age, the father replies, "It was only a bug, honey."

The daughter gets a confused look on her face, and after a minute she says, "Sure had a big dick!" :lol:

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This man's in the line at the supermarket check out. But when he gets to the register he realises he's forgotten to pick up his condoms. So he asks the checkout girl if she could have someone bring them. She replies, "Of course, Sir, but I'll just check your size. Drop your pants please." Wow, he thinks, this is great service, and he drops 'em. She reaches over the counter, grabs his cock, picks the store intercom and announces, "One box of large condoms to check out 10."

Well, the next man in line thought this was interesting and, so, when he gets to the check out, he tells the checker that he too has forgotten to get condoms, and asks if she could have some brought up to the register. Sure enough, she asks him to drop his pants to check his size, gives him a quick feel, picks up the store intercom and says, "One box of medium sized condoms to check out 10."

A few customers back was this teen-age boy. He thought what he'd seen was just so cool, and he'd never had any sexual experience with a woman, so this seemed like his big chance. When he gets to the register, he tells the checker he needs some condoms bringing up. She asks him what size, and he says he doesn't know. So she asks him to drop his pants for her to check. One quick feel, and she picks up the intercom and announces, "Clean up crew to check out 10!"

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This fellow was so deeply in love that just before he was married, he had his bride's name tattooed on his love muscle. Normally, only the first and last letters were visible, although when he was aroused, the tattoo spelled out W-E-N-D-Y. Now they're on their honeymoon at a resort in Montego Bay. One night, in the men's room, this fellow finds himself standing next to a tall Jamaican at the urinal.

To his amazement, he notices that this man, has the letters W-Y tattooed on his penis, also. "Excuse me," he says, "but I couldn't help noticing that you have the same tattoo as me, is you have a girlfriend named Wendy, too?" "No way, mon", the Jamaican laughs, "I work for the Tourist board. Mine reads, "Welcome to Jamaica, mon, hope you have a nice day.'"

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A woman was very despondent over not having sex in quite some time. She was becoming agitated and worried that she might never find a mate. In hopes of finding a solution to her problem, she decided that it was time to see a doctor. Looking thru the phone book, she came upon a Chinese sex therapist named Dr. Chang.

When the woman arrived, she told the doctor her symptoms and he said, "Take off all your clothes and you crawl real fass away from me across the froor."

She crawled to the other side of the room and Dr. Chang said, "Now...you crawl real fass back to me," and she did. Dr. Chang shook his head and said, "you haf real bad case of Ed Zachary disease....worse case I ever see! That why you haf sex probrem."

The woman was completely confused and asked the doctor just what was Ed Zachary Disease and he replied, "Ed Zachary Disease....that when your face rook ED-ZACHARY rike your ass!"

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The priest in a small Irish village loved the cock and ten hens he kept in the hen house behind the church. But one Saturday night the cock went missing! The priest knew that cock fights happened in the village so he started to question his parishioners in church the next morning.

During Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?"

All the men stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?"

All the women stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?"

Half the women stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen MY cock?"

All the nuns, three altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up.

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A friend of mine wants to be a policeman, so he can be in a business were the customer is always wrong
Dick

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Adam and Eve, some dick jokes, and a doctor joke

Adam and Eve, some dick jokes, and a doctor joke

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